Tuesday, June 07, 2005

Shortchange Scam


It is a warm Saturday afternoon and I’m sitting on my window sill sipping a cold glass of lemonade. The day seems pretty boring and ordinary, but plans, ideas, and thoughts are all whirling through my mind. Will it work? Will I get caught? Is he going to fall for it like I’ve planned? Should I wear my other shirt instead? Or should I do it another time...
My parents are out doing their grocery shopping (their regular Saturday routine), while I’m home alone. It’s been my favorite thing to do on Saturdays like these, ever since we moved into this house, just to sit at my big window sill and think. Once, about nine years ago, when I was six, I got a plate of watermelons and started spitting seeds out my window. I used to think that watermelon trees could grow in my garden. But the next day, my teacher told my class that watermelons didn’t grow on trees. It was quite a tragedy.
Anyway, right now, I’m looking at my neighbor’s house impatiently, waiting for Rob to appear. It’s already quarter-past one, and his part-time shift at the convenience store starts at about half-past one. I’ve finished my lemonade already, and I’m sucking on the thin slice of lemon. Yum.
Finally, Rob appears. Sheesh, he looks awful as usual. He’s wearing this gardening straw hat and a pair of haggard, soil-stained overalls. He looks scrawnier than ever. Still, he’s going to be my perfect catch of the day. I hurriedly get off the window sill, nearly toppling over my glass and look into the mirror.
I got a decent amount of freckles from my mom. She liked to call them angel’s kisses.
“Lindsey, you know those spots on your cheeks? Those are angel’s kisses. That’s how precious you are.” She told me every time she gave me a bath when I was little. As I grew up, I came to know that it wasn’t true, just like all the Santa Clause and Tooth Fairy stories.
It is the middle of the summer and my freckles seem to have multiplied. My cheeks look rosier too. And my eyes look more brown. My hair seems... Oh right. Rob. Focus Lindsey. Focus. I change out of my pyjamas and yank on my pink tank top. A t-shirt would be too hot for me. Nevertheless, I slide into my favorite pair of faded jeans. Comfort isn’t a priority now; I have to look good.
In my bag, I carefully prepare a ten dollar bill and a total change of ninety cents. This, I can’t miss; it is the most crucial part. I’ve learned a few cons from my grandfather, whom I absolutely adore. Pigeon drop, shell game, rocks in a box, or badge play come back- but none of them, I planned to carry out. Instead, there is a perfect one which I am preparing for today. I learned it from a movie I watched recently. It’s called Shortchange Scam. I wish the name sounded cooler. I’ll probably think of a better name soon.
I step outside my house and immediately feel the heat of the summer against my skin. The radio is blaring softly from one of the houses and I start to hum along. It’s playing “My Girl” by the Temptations. I love that song. My dad used to sing it to me when I was little. He used to sing a ton of other songs to me, but this was my favorite. That’s probably why I listen to oldies rather than this generation’s pop music. Pop music seems so meaningless and repetitive. It makes teenagers feel insecure; well, at least most of them.
I decide to kill some time at a magazine stand just in case I am too early. After finishing a few articles on gardening, I look at my watch.
It’s one-thirty five.
I better get going. I carefully put this month's issue of Fine Gardening back on the rusty shelf. Don’t mistake me; I do not like gardening. I just think it might be helpful because I might end up having to talk to Rob about it. He loves gardening as much as I love cons. This issue had articles on summer gardening, and one of them said that Perennials (whatever that is) provide the garden with its “foundation”- plants such as hostas, foxgloves, grasses, liatris, peonies, astilbes, black-eyed Susans, daylilies, and Hercules? Or was it Hershey's? I can’t remember. Anyway, he’s just really weird. Explains why he’s so unpopular at school. It doesn't help, either, that he often smells of cut grass.
I reach the convenience store and peer inside. There he is. Honestly, he looks a lot better in his red polo shirt uniform. I push open the glass door, and the bell rings. The air-con feels cool and nice. I can’t wait for the winter to come.
I walk inside the store and my eyes meet his. He flushes.
“Hey.. um... h.. hi Lindsey.” His nose is flaring as he speaks.
“Hi Rob!” I give my most genuine smile.
I already have in mind what I intend to buy, but I decide to walk through the aisles. I love looking at the neatly packed items; especially those at the candy section. The radio is on playing some song by The Corr’s, and I start humming. Along the fifth aisle, there are pain killers, menopausal pills, toothbrushes, shaving cream and... tongue cleaners? Who on earth uses a tongue cleaner? I giggle to myself.
“Would you like to purchase one? It’s rather popular among the older women.” Rob suddenly breaks in.
“Oh. Older women? Hmm.. Cool!” I control my laughter. “It’s okay, I think my tongue’s pretty clean.” I stick out my tongue, and he blushes. I walk over to the counter as he follows me.
“Well, I’m thinking of buying a pack of gum but I don’t know which one. You got any favorites?” I ask as I run my fingers along the rows of gum. Please say Wrigley's. Please say Wrigley's.
“Um... I’d go for Xylitol.”
“Hey, I like that one too! Great choice.” I lie. Are you kidding me? Xylitol? Ew. But hey, this is my game. Chewing gum flavor doesn't matter. I place the pack of gum on the counter and he goes over to scan it.
“So, have you gotten your... Perennials?” I ask knowingly. I have to distract him.
“Pere... what?” He looks puzzled. “Um, I apologise, I’m not updated on issues about um.. skin care.” He then blushes for the third time.
“Oh. Yeah, Of course. I mean, why would you?!” Crap. Did I say it wrong? Oh well.
“Here you go. That will be ninety cents.” He smiles for the very first time and passes me my pack of gum. Yes! Here comes my game! I rummage around my bag pretending to find change.
“Hmm... seems like I don’t have any change. Is a ten dollar bill okay with you?” Looking guiltily, I pull out my ten dollar bill and hand it to him.
“Sure. Tha.. That’s perfectly fine.” He gently brushes his hand across the surface of my palm to take the bill. He’s probably never really touched a girl before. I’m not surprised.
“Here’s your change. Nine dollars and ten cents.” His voice cracks in the middle.
“Thanks Rob.” I smile at him. “See ya.” I slowly walk towards the glass doors .
I pause to dump my gum inside my bag, and after a few moments, turn around. Rob looks puzzled but hopeful at the same time as he sees me walking back.
“Hey, seems like I had change. Silly me. Well, I thought it might help if you had smaller change instead of my ten dollar bill.” I take out ninety cents from my bag and hand it to him. This is the bait, and right now, he’s the fish. He must take it.
“Th.. Thanks!” He takes the change and I’m bubbling with excitement.
“So... can I have my ten dollar bill back?” I cross my fingers.
“Oh right! Right. Sure.” Cha-ching. The sound of victory. I’ve almost won my game. The cash register opens and he pulls out the exact same ten dollar bill that I gave him. “Here’s your ten dollar bill.”
The ten dollar bill is in my hand.
“Thanks Rob.” I beam at him.
“You’re welcome. And um... I really like your out.. out.. outfit.” Now he’s really nervous.
“Thanks. That polo shirt looks great on you too.”
He blushes and looks down to hide his flushed cheeks. There is a moment of silence.
I escape.
“Lindsey. You...um..you...you.........Would you like to do something some... some.. sometime..?”
There’s no reply. Finally, he takes the courage and looks up.
I’m gone.
The sound of the bell above the door can still be heard vaguely as a trace of my escape.
Shortchange scam- it was my very first con, and I had succeeded with a profit of ten dollars.

Friday, May 27, 2005

cake reincarnation

tom baked a cake. katie ate the cake. the cake disappeared. the cake became poop. poop said hello to the world. poop got flushed down into the great watery unknowns. poop went back to nature.
the end.

Tuesday, May 24, 2005

beautiful story of love! ...heartbreak, and... DEATH.

meg's random short story
(tis actually a true story, quite a tragic one, just very metaphorically written.) (okay its not really, really true, just some parts are. yes yes. sey sey. well... the ending is not true, fortunately.)

once there lived a snail who was in love with bob. (okay kids, this is the fun part! bob can be ANY animal you want him to be! oh ho ho!) her name was.. umm.. suzy. day and night, suzy dreamt and hoped that one day, fate would allow her and bob to meet. sadly, she knew that the chances were very unlikely. many days filled with tears and hopelessness and not meeting bob followed, but suzy never gave up.
but! ONE DAY, as suzy was dreaming about bob at her usual wet and grassy spot, she saw, in the distance, bob walking towards her. this couldn't be!! suzy's heart skipped a beat as she set her gaze towards her handsome and charming love. it was indeed a dream come true! but this moment of hope did not last very long. bob, not seeing suzy beneath his feet, pranced (sorry, this verb just limited your choice of animals) over her and with his salty foot (don't ask) he crushed suzy with all his weight. salt painfully seeped in to suzy's fragile skin and eventually dissolved her whole body into a slime of nothingness.

the end.